The Legalization of Same-Sex Marriage: We've Got this!

Immediately following Friday’s decision by the Supreme Court of the United States that legalizes same-sex marriage in all 50 states, unabashedly and humbly The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Mormon) stood as a shining example of how faithful members of the Lord’s Church should stand stating that LDS doctrine on marriage will not change.


"The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints acknowledges that following today's ruling by the Supreme Court, same-sex marriages are now legal in the United States. The Court's decision does not alter the Lord's doctrine that marriage is a union between a man and a woman ordained by God. While showing respect for those who think differently, the Church will continue to teach and promote marriage between a man and a woman as a central part of our doctrine and practice."

Included along with the above statement is The Divine Institution of Marriage, which I highly recommend re-reading.

Although the complete legalization of gay marriage in the United States has been a sober journey, faithful members of the Lord’s Church are prepared -- we've got this! We’ve made covenants. We know the doctrine. We know the Lord’s position on the matter because Prophets and Apostles, who we believe are inspired by God, have counseled and taught us both the doctrine and to love those with differing views. Many have sincerely prayed for personal understanding and help to know how to navigate this issue on many different levels—both within and outside of the Church and in our families.

Surely, there could not be a more pertinent reason for God to have representatives on the earth today than to ensure that eternal truth relating to the family is available to every humble seeker of light. We live amidst the greatest moral confusions in the history of the world where right and wrong have literally been turned inside out. Many good people find it nearly impossible to distinguish truth against the continuous onslaught of politically correct immorality, let alone stand for it. However, as members of the Lord’s Church, we need not be confused by what is packaged in opposition to the Lord while some choose to disregard and even celebrate these temporal victories.


Marriage is ordained by God, only between and man and a woman. Period. This is love—not the current lie perpetrated in an unconstitutional motion by a handful of activist judges sadly found in nearly every state and by a few justices in the highest Court of the land. Don’t be fooled.

Beginning today, people who believe in moral absolutes and/or base their life’s determination upon eternal truth are about to face a historic challenge in buffeting being labeled as bigots, religious zealots, and/or fanatics, which will occur with increased frequency. Less than 10 years ago, today’s reality would have been the stuff of your worst nightmare.

If upholding and valuing God’s teaching about marriage renders people of faith on the wrong side of history, then so be it. We know that, too, is a lie. What those who choose to see us in a negative light don’t understand, or refuse to accept, or simply respect, is that our position is not one of fanaticism, judgment, or hate, but of love and trust. Our position on marriage is not our own, but God’s—the very Author of life. So stellar is His position, that it is impossible to reject it—the biology is absolute fact. If it were possible, the perpetuation of the human race would be damned.

God ordained marriage is a spiritual and physical revelation, thus cannot be converted into a manmade definition. It is a complementary relationship with a resulting intent to produce children. Thus the natural family makes its appearance. It is how God intended children to be born and raised, and it is what is best for children. The birthright of every child born is inherent in their conception: a mother and a father. Whenever possible it is the duty of society to ensure that every child is raised by a mother and father.

I firmly believe that the lie of same-sex marriage will be devastating to untold numbers of children whose inherent right to a mother and a father has now been stripped by the United States Supreme Court. Truly, this is one of the most violent acts of selfishness the world, thus far, has ever witnessed. Although my marriage is just fine and will be, any other assurances of how same sex marriage will affect untold generations are completely off the table.

Nearly 20 years ago the inspired document “The Family: A Proclamation to the World” was published and warned individuals, communities, and leaders of nations of the devastating results of not adhering to God’s counsel on the family:

“WE WARN that individuals who violate covenants of chastity, who abuse spouse or offspring, or who fail to fulfill family responsibilities will one day stand accountable before God. Further, we warn that the disintegration of the family will bring upon individuals, communities, and nations the calamities foretold by ancient and modern prophets.
WE CALL UPON responsible citizens and officers of government everywhere to promote those measures designed to maintain and strengthen the family as the fundamental unit of society.”

God-ordained marriage requires no government sanction, but great blessings are promised as it is supported and honored. No government, in reality, can declare it obsolete or redefine it. Because we understand this, we trust that whatever is happening in the world right now to try and undermine the great plan of salvation will ultimately fail. Just as every knee shall bow and every tongue confess that Jesus is the Christ, so too shall they who currently oppose His Plan concede that the only way to experience eternal joy is within a marriage according to absolute truth.

I hope these words from an Apostle of the Lord will give you strength and encouragement needed at this time and in the coming days to stand with Jesus Christ and His chosen servants.

Elder Neal A. Maxwell:

“Make no mistake about it, brothers and sisters, in the months and years ahead, events are likely to require each member to decide whether or not he will follow the First Presidency. Members will find it more difficult to halt longer between two opinions. (See 1 Kgs. 18:21.) President Marion G. Romney said, many years ago, that he had ‘never hesitated to follow the counsel of the Authorities of the Church even though it crossed my social, professional or political life’ (in Conference Report, Apr. 1941, p. 123). This is a hard doctrine, but it is a particularly vital doctrine in a society which is becoming more wicked. In short, brothers and sisters, not being ashamed of the gospel of Jesus Christ includes not being ashamed of the prophets of Jesus Christ! We are now entering a time of incredible ironies. Let us cite but one of these ironies which is yet in its subtle stages: We will see a maximum, if indirect, effort made to establish irreligion as the state religion. It is actually a new form of paganism which uses the carefully preserved and cultivated freedoms of western civilization to shrink freedom, even as it rejects the value essence of our rich Judeo-Christian heritage.”

“Your discipleship may see the time when such religious convictions are discounted. M. J. Sobran also said, ‘A religious conviction is now a second-class conviction, expected to step deferentially to the back of the secular bus, and not to get uppity about it’ (Human Life Review, Summer 1978, pp. 58–59). This new irreligious imperialism seeks to disallow certain opinions simply because those opinions grow out of religious convictions. Resistance to abortion will be seen as primitive. Concern over the institution of the family will be viewed as untrendy and unenlightened.”

“Before the ultimate victory of the forces of righteousness, some skirmishes will be lost. Even in these, however, let us leave a record so that the choices are clear, letting others do as they will in the face of prophetic ounsel. There will also be times, happily, when a minor defeat seems probable, but others will step forward, having been rallied to rightness by what we do. We will know the joy, on occasion, of having awakened a slumbering majority of the decent people of all races and creeds which was, till then, unconscious of itself. Jesus said that when the fig trees put forth their leaves, ‘summer is nigh’ (Matt. 24:32). Thus warned that summer is upon us, let us not then complain of the heat!”


How grateful we are for the Great Plan of Happiness and the knowledge we have about marriage, its purpose, and eternal families. I can honestly say that as a member of the Church I never anticipated the days we are now experiencing. I am committed, with love for others and the many differences we might have, to rise to the challenge given us by our Savior Jesus Christ to live His gospel with love and conviction—and above all, without fear.

tDMg

Kathryn Skaggs

This post is part of a blog hop with these fabulous bloggers! We're talking about our marriages, giving tips, and sharing what we've learned but most importantly defending traditional marriage between a man and a woman.
Marriage between a man and a woman blog hop
Jocelyn @ We Talk of Christ | Jenifer @ Moss Moments | Montserrat @ Cranial Hiccups

19 comments:

  1. Well worded and effective use of quotes- thank you.

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  2. I have been an adult member since 1988. I heard many leaders state the woes of same-sex marriage and homosexuality. Apart from religious dogma, I have yet to hear a compelling reason or argument of how, specifically, same-sex marriage harms me, my family, my neighbors and community, or society at large. I have asked many in the church to demonstrate the harm done, and yet I am still waiting. It just seems that for something soooo bad, the harm would be very evident and obvious.
    Rob Williams, Seneca SC ward

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    1. Then I seriously doubt anything I might contribute would even in the least educate you. But perhaps you might find a visit to discussingmarriage.org helpful in your quest.

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    2. Frankly, I and most of my friends and colleagues welcomed the Supreme Court decision to legalize marriage equality. Like the previous respondent, I utterly fail to see the harm done to my heterosexual marriage or to society in general. Who consenting adults marry is their business, and not mine. Homosexual couples will exist whether gay marriage is legal or not. By denying them the right to marry all we’re doing is discriminating, prejudicial and punishing them for not sharing our beliefs. Worse, we purposefully deny them equal treatment under the law, a fundamental constitutional principle. Our nation is NOT a theocracy and should not treat our fellow gay citizens as if it was one.
      As a scientist, I am also troubled that many people hold antiquated and erroneous beliefs about what same-sex attraction is or isn’t. For starters, it has become abundantly clear in the scientific community that people don’t “choose” their sexual orientation. Any statement proclaiming that sexual orientation is a “life-style choice” is not supported by any legitimate, peer-reviewed study of the last half century. The longstanding consensus of the APA, AMA, behavioral and social sciences and the health and mental health professions is that homosexuality, quote: “is a normal and positive variation of human sexual orientation.”
      And you know what? If this is truly “the end of days”, I for one am happy to face it. At least we'll be going down because love, equality and acceptance prevailed over hate and bigotry. And now there will probably even be glitter. Lots and lots of glitter.

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    3. @Rob- one other thing to think about is that throughout history, anyone deceased for whom records have been kept is entitled to posthumous temple ordinances if they didn't receive them in this life, including those who were adopted and had their adoptive parents' names recorded on their birth certificate. SSM takes away that right from innocent children adopted by same-sex parents (who can never be sealed to each other as a man and woman can), thus severing the vital sealing link that in God's plan is meant to bind together all people to their parents and ancestors as one eternal family.

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    4. http://www.acpeds.org/same-sex-marriage-not-best-for-children

      Here's one. The american college of pediatrics filed an amicus brief in this case in favor of traditional marriage. The article link above tells why.

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    5. The American College of Pediatrics is not an actual reliable pediatric association, but a fringe group. The real group is the American Academy of Pediatrics.

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    6. nonsequiturable - There is a vast difference between "lifestyle choice" and "choosing to be homosexual". One is a choice of action, while the other is insinuating a choice of attraction, something someone may not have control over. Let me give an example. Pick a famous actor between the ages of 30-40 and let's pretend that I'm madly attracted to that person. Can I choose the fact that I'm attracted to him? Not really (though I can make choices to distance myself from it if that person is simply not the kind of person I want to have any kind of relationship with - just because someone is attrractive on the outside, it doesn't mean that they are attractive on the inside). Let's say that I met that person on the street. Because of my attraction, would I then have no choice but to go sleep with him? Of course not. That's just absurd. To insist that homosexual individuals are somehow less than Human (and thus less abe to control themselves when it comes to desires that non-productive) seems to be a terrible disservice to homosexual individuals. I believe them every bit as Human as I, and therefore every bit as capable of ruling over their feelings of attraction toward others (reguardless of gender). If others dissagree with me, I'm afraid there's not much more I can do to convince them.

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  3. I stand with you as a defender of covenants and home. "...as for me and my house,...we will serve the Lord."
    --Joshua 24:15

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  4. I wholeheartedly support the Prophet and other LDS Church leaders and will defend (kindly) the proclamation on the family and its definition of marriage. This is certainly a time to stand up and be counted.

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  5. It is so sad that this law ever touched the surface of our time, though it is inevitable as the world gets more wicked. I just know that people will suffer for trying to redefine a never-changing doctrine about family God, Himself, organized.
    I say let them choose what they will, but as for me and my family, we will serve God and continue to love His doctrines no matter what. It doesn't matter what antagonistic words and acts people might do to try to dissuade us from our devotion. But let them know that we respect their ideals but we will continue to move forward with what God expects from us- a family that can be forever.

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  6. Thank you for your article, I couldn't agree more, I will not allow the misguided political correctness to make me feel ashamed of Gods gospel and his law. Though I don't like being called names by those who cannot defend their position, I cannot condone that which my God has condemned but I can treat everyone with kindness and respect.

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  7. I just love the doctrine of the family, although I know how hard it is when you feel like you fall outside of the doctrine. The truth is, we are all part of God's family and that will never change.

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  8. "I firmly believe that the lie of same-sex marriage will be devastating to untold numbers of children whose inherent right to a mother and a father has now been stripped by the United States Supreme Court. Truly, this is one of the most violent acts of selfishness the world, thus far, has ever witnessed." AMEN! And we are now about to witness what Boyd K Packer prophesied in 1994: "As we continue on our course, these things will follow as night the day:

    "The distance between the Church and a world set on a course which we cannot follow will steadily increase.

    "Some will fall away into apostasy, break their covenants, and replace the plan of redemption with their own rules.

    "Across the world, those who now come by the tens of thousands will inevitably come as a flood to where the family is safe." (The Father and the Family, 1994)

    The good news is that after all the violent mess that is coming, there is going to be a very happy ending!!

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  9. "I firmly believe that the lie of same-sex marriage will be devastating to untold numbers of children whose inherent right to a mother and a father has now been stripped by the United States Supreme Court. Truly, this is one of the most violent acts of selfishness the world, thus far, has ever witnessed." AMEN! And we are now about to witness what Boyd K Packer prophesied in 1994: "As we continue on our course, these things will follow as night the day:

    "The distance between the Church and a world set on a course which we cannot follow will steadily increase.

    "Some will fall away into apostasy, break their covenants, and replace the plan of redemption with their own rules.

    "Across the world, those who now come by the tens of thousands will inevitably come as a flood to where the family is safe" (The Father and the Family, April 1994).

    The good news: after all the violent mess that is coming, there is going to be a very happy ending--the Second Coming!!

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  10. Thank you for your write up.
    It's been an interesting journey, so far, and I have experienced the marginalization of, not my beliefs, but my knowledge. For I know that God is a god of love, and is also a god of laws. And being no respecter of persons, allows choices against the truth to exist along with the natural consequences of those choices. As far as what the consequences are in the legalizing of unnatural marriages, against the wisdom and counsel of God, I do not know. It may have no immediate effect upon natural marriages, but there will be an effect. And it could be such an effect as was experienced by Sodom and Gomorrah.

    What I do know is that just like pornography, theft, murder, and lying, unnatural relationships are wrong, and no amount of intellectual wrangling and justifications will make it otherwise.

    I don't care about history; I will be on the right side of God.

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  11. Kathryn,
    Thank you for this. Beautifully-written and well thought out. I, too, stand with the Lord and His prophets in defending traditional marriage and the family. Thank you for being such an example of what a defender of the faith looks like; we all learn much from you and others who have heeded the charge to #ShareGoodness.

    If I may add some personal insight, there's something I feel is missing from much of the dialogue this past week that is so important. That which is missing is the fact that there are so many active, temple-worthy members who experience same-sex attraction but defend The Proclamation as diligently as any other member. I have served in many leadership callings at the ward and stake level and had opportunity to hear stories of hope and stories of heartbreak from these members. This past week has been exceptionally hard for this community of Saints. Unfortunately, much of the current dialogue is causing more heartbreak than hope for them. On a daily basis, they are striving to reconcile their feelings with their faith, and of course they’re doing all in their power to err on the side of their faith.

    They don’t need to hear “love the sinner, hate the sin” (I’m not suggesting you said that, I’m just adding to the conversation). We don’t say that to any other members. We don’t say to the bishop “I hate your shortcomings and imperfections, but I’ll love you.” When members say this, our good SSA brothers and sisters feel that’s what’s being said to them and it adds to their pain. I think most members would be surprised to know that there are Sunday School teachers, Relief Society Presidents, and even bishops and members of stake presidencies who experience same-sex attraction. But because of shame and fear of judgment, they suffer in quiet desperation.

    I love this quote on mormonsandgays.org (an official website of the Church) by Elder Cook which I believe would be so important for all members to keep in mind: "As a church, nobody should be more loving and compassionate. Let us be at the forefront in terms of expressing love, compassion and outreach. Let’s not have families exclude or be disrespectful of those who choose a different lifestyle as a result of their feelings about their own gender." Our brothers and sisters who experience same-sex attraction yet live lives as worthily as other members need to know that they’re loved and cared about regardless of the challenges they face in life.
    If we all acted according to what Elder Cook said, our wards and branches would be safe places for them to share their experiences and help us grow in our own faith because of their witness and testimonies of the divinity of the family. Thank you for letting me voice this. I look forward to the day when the Lord comes again, but in the meantime, I think we can all do a little better to comfort those who stand in need of comfort. And if there’s a group that needs comforting right now, it’s our beloved brothers and sisters whose lives are impacted so directly by this significant challenge.

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  12. Kathryn,
    Thank you for this. Beautifully-written and well thought out. I, too, stand with the Lord and His prophets in defending traditional marriage and the family. Thank you for being such an example of what a defender of the faith looks like; we all learn much from you and others who have heeded the charge to #ShareGoodness.

    If I may add some personal insight, there's something I feel is missing from much of the dialogue this past week that is so important. That which is missing is the fact that there are so many active, temple-worthy members who experience same-sex attraction but defend The Proclamation as diligently as any other member. I have served in many leadership callings at the ward and stake level and had opportunity to hear stories of hope and stories of heartbreak from these members. This past week has been exceptionally hard for this community of Saints. Unfortunately, much of the current dialogue is causing more heartbreak than hope for them. On a daily basis, they are striving to reconcile their feelings with their faith, and of course they’re doing all in their power to err on the side of their faith.

    It always pains me when I hear “love the sinner, hate the sin” said in context of this issue (I’m not suggesting you said that, I’m just adding to the conversation). We don’t say that to any other members. We don’t say to the bishop “I hate your shortcomings and imperfections, but I’ll love you.” When members say this, our good SSA brothers and sisters feel that’s what’s being said to them and it adds to their pain. I think most members would be surprised to know that there are Sunday School teachers, Relief Society Presidents, and even bishops and members of stake presidencies who experience same-sex attraction. But because of shame and fear of judgment, they suffer in quiet desperation.

    I love this quote on mormonsandgays.org (an official website of the Church) by Elder Cook which I believe would be so important for all members to keep in mind: "As a church, nobody should be more loving and compassionate. Let us be at the forefront in terms of expressing love, compassion and outreach. Let’s not have families exclude or be disrespectful of those who choose a different lifestyle as a result of their feelings about their own gender." Our brothers and sisters who experience same-sex attraction yet live lives as worthily as other members need to know that they’re loved and cared about regardless of the challenges they face in life.

    If we all acted according to what Elder Cook said, our wards and branches would be safe places for them to share their experiences and help us grow in our own faith because of their witness and testimonies of the divinity of the family. Thank you for letting me voice this. I look forward to the day when the Lord comes again, but in the meantime, I think we can all do a little better to comfort those who stand in need of comfort. And if there’s a group that needs comforting right now, it’s our beloved brothers and sisters whose lives are impacted so directly by this significant challenge.

    ReplyDelete